Everybody Wants the Keys Until It’s Time to Earn Them
(based on a video I did on this topic years ago.)
I used to talk a lot about secret societies. Years ago, I spent ridiculous amounts of time going down rabbit holes. Who knows what? Who belongs to what? What symbols mean what? What are they doing next? What knowledge is being withheld? Who has access to the “real” teachings? And of couse all the reasons wne who’s behind the suppression.
Eventually I reached a point where I had to ask myself……..Okay. Suppose we uncover every secret on Earth. Then what??? 😂
Because you can spend your entire life collecting information about hidden knowledge and still never actually become anything different. I saw that a lot in my years in alternative radio, with all the “experts.” You can read every forbidden book…watch every documentary, memorize every symbol and study it in every language, know every conspiracy, elitist, celebrity, go to every retreat, study every mystery school…And STILL be the same undisciplined asshole you were before you opened the first book!
There…I said it! 😂
Everybody Wants the Secret
Very few people want the training. That is something I understand much better now than I did twenty years ago. We want the initiation, the hidden knowledge, the magic, the psychic abilities, the manifestation, sacred sexuality, the ancient teachings and akashic records, the secret ceremonies, magic underwear, keys to the “kingdom” and the “POWER”…
But discipline? Sacrifice? Self-examination? Responsibility? Consistency? Restraint? Doing the same difficult thing when nobody is watching and nobody is going to clap for you?
Suddenly everybody has somewhere else more important to be. 😂
And that made me reconsider something. Maybe not every piece of knowledge should simply be thrown onto the sidewalk for anyone who wanders by. What did the bible say about casting pearls before swine? Not because somebody is inherently better than somebody else. Not because knowledge should belong to an elite class. But because knowledge without maturity can become dangerous.
We understand this everywhere else…You don’t hand car keys to a child simply because the child really, really wants to drive…or because they saw you do it hundreds of times. You don’t put someone in charge in a surgery room because they watched three documentaries about anatomy. You don’t earn a black belt because you bought the outfit or get put on stage because you watched a youtube video. You don’t receive a PhD because you attended one interesting weekend seminar…
There are stages. Years, decades of training. Years of choosing practice instead of play. More mistakes than most are willing to make, or even admit to. Self responsibility. Demonstrated competence…Why would spiritual development be the one arena where none of that applies?
The Spiritual Community Has a Performance Problem
Oh yeah…We’re going there… 😂 You could also call it performance anxiety if you like. Or just basic fakery, trying to fit in, seeking attention, etc…there is an enormous difference between looking spiritual and living spiritually. Incense is easy. Crystals are easy. A beautiful altar is easy. Cool Clothes, hats or hairdos are easy. An ashram or retreat is easy. Posting memes about raising your vibration is extremely easy…
Living with integrity when nobody sees you? Harder.
Controlling your mouth when you want to destroy somebody? Harder.
Keeping your word? Harder.
Owning your mistakes and taking accountability? Harder.
Not manipulating people? Harder.
Changing a behavior you know is harming you? Harder.
Doing what you claim to believe even when it costs you convenience, popularity, money, pleasure, or social approval? MUCH harder.
That is where I begin questioning what people mean when they tell me they are “practicing spirituality.” Almost like practicing medicine. LOL If spirituality exists only in your ceremonies, your vocabulary, your clothing, your social media page, or the places where other spiritual people can see you doing it…what exactly are you practicing?
An identity? A costume? A brand? Because to me, true spirituality isn’t something you practice for an hour and then put back on the shelf. You live it!
Religion Abused Discipline
That Doesn’t Make Discipline Evil
This distinction matters. As we all know, religions have used discipline as a weapon. Whether it’s through sexual shame, body shame, fear, threats of eternal punishment, control, rules with no explanation…authority figures telling people their bodies, desires, questions, or instincts were inherently dirty or sinful. THAT has caused enormous harm! I understand why people run screaming in the opposite direction.
AND here is where spiritual communities sometimes make another mistake…If one extreme was abusive, that doesn’t automatically make the opposite extreme wise. I used to call it cult hopping…lol
Religion used sexuality to control people? That doesn’t mean every sexual impulse is sacred merely because you had it.
Religion used fasting and food restrictions? That doesn’t mean self-discipline around food is inherently oppressive.
Religion demanded sacrifice? That doesn’t mean sacrifice itself is evil.
Sometimes sacrifice simply means…I want this more than I want that. And technically, that’s adulthood. 😂
Sexuality Is a Perfect Example
Sex has been so weaponized by religion that many people understandably wanted to reclaim it. Rgihtfully so. Your body isn’t dirty. Desire isn’t automatically sinful and pleasure isn’t evil. And somehow we occasionally leap from that into…Nothing matters! Everything is sacred! Do whatever feels good! To a very dark extreme…
Maybe we could use one molecule of discernment here…
Intimacy CAN create attachments, entities…call them psychological, emotional, hormonal, energetic, spiritual, relational, call them whatever framework makes sense to you…but pretending that deeply intimate exchanges between humans are always consequence free seems just as silly to me as pretending sexuality itself is evil. In my own spiritual framework, I believe people exchange much more than physical contact through intimacy…You don’t have to believe that. We can still be friends…lol
But even without my spiritual language, relationships can leave profound emotional and psychological imprints. So perhaps discernment isn’t always oppression. Perhaps sometimes it is simply wisdom. Maybe sometimes we should learn from our elders, rather than repeat…?
Before You Seek Power, Learn to Govern Yourself
THIS is the part that tends to make people mad. 😂 Stand in line… People want magical power over circumstances. Power over outcomes. Power to manifest, to influence, to attract or repel somebody…the power to “curse” others, to “make” somebody love or “play nice” with them. And I am sitting here thinking…….DUDE…You cannot even govern yourself! Why are you trying to govern the universe?
😂😂😂
And get mad all you want, but the REAL “magic” is in allowance, surrender…NOT trying to manipulate outcomes…ALLOWING free will for ALL! Being able to go with the flow……..not fighting the current… I seriously have NEVER understood “love spells” and why anyone would even consider it. Wouldn’t you want/NEED to know the love of your life is there because they WANT to be…? Not because of influence, force or so called magic???
Let’s get REAL!!!
If changing one habit that is hurting you feels impossible…if every impulse must immediately become action…if you cannot tolerate frustration…if you cannot hear “no”…if you cannot delay gratification…if you cannot admit you were wrong…if you cannot control your desire to punish somebody who hurt your feelings…what exactly do you believe qualifies you for MORE power???
That question isn’t cruelty. It’s responsibility. Before asking for mastery over anything else…develop some mastery over yourself!
NO “master, guru, healer, shaman, medicine woman, doctor, pill, celebrity, supplement” can do it for you!
Magic Is (Not) Control
This may be one of the biggest dividing lines for me. If your interest in magic is primarily,
– “How can I make this person do what I want?”
– “How can I make that person fall in love with me?
– “How can I hurt someone who hurt me?”
– “How can I force this outcome?”
– “How can I dominate somebody else’s will?”
Then I don’t particularly care how impressive your altar looks. That isn’t spiritual mastery to me. That’s fear based control-freakery wearing ceremonial clothingplaying pretend!
Power over another person is not the kind of power that interests me. In fact I consider it a grave sin in the natural laws I adhere to.
Power over myself is what interests me these days…Can I govern my reactions? Can I recognize when ego is at the steering wheel? Can I sit with discomfort and despair instead of immediately throwing it at somebody else? Can I recognize my own projections and trauma triggers without punishing someone else in denial that they exist? Can I stop myself from retaliating simply because retaliation would feel satisfying for thirty seconds? Can I choose compassion without becoming a doormat? Can I establish a boundary without needing to hurt another person? Can I remain myself when everybody around me wants me to become something else???
THAT is power. And it is considerably harder than floating a spoon across the room. 😂 That’s why “Men Stare at Goats!” (sorry, I had to. lol)
Maybe I Understand Secret Societies Better Now
Years ago, I used to think, how dare anybody keep knowledge secret? Now? lol I understand the idea a little differently. Again, I’m NOT endorsing every secret society on Earth…calm down…and hear me out. 🙂
I’m talking about the concept of progressive knowledge. We already use it everywhere. Education, martial arts, medicine, music, engineering, sports, spiritual traditions, etc…
You begin somewhere. You learn. You demonstrate understanding. You gain responsibility…then more becomes available…Why?
Because the information at Level 10 may be completely useless…or potentially harmful to somebody who hasn’t understood Level 2. That doesn’t necessarily make Level 10 people “better.” Is a Graduate “better” than a newborn baby? It just means they’re farther along in that particular subject. We’re all beginners somewhere and we’re all advanced somewhere. That’s one reason I have always thought of life like school. Earth School. We are ALL in ddifferent classrooms, different subjects, different grades and different strengths…
Sometimes somebody explains something to you and it sounds insane…5 years later…you suddenly understand exactly what they meant. It’s called life experience…They didn’t necessarily become smarter during those five years, we were finally ready to “hear” it.
Beware Anyone Who Uses “Higher Levels” to Control You
And here is the other side. Because humans ruin everything eventually. 😂
The idea of levels can become another ego trap. “I know more than you.” “I am more evolved than you.” “I have secret knowledge.” “You must obey me because you’re not spiritually advanced enough to understand.” YEAH….NOPE!
There is a massive difference between, “You may understand this differently after more experience,” and, “I outrank you spiritually, therefore surrender your autonomy.” The moment ones spiritual authority requires your submission, your money, your body, your silence, or your unquestioning obedience…it’s probably time to run.
True knowledge should increase responsibility, not entitlement. Ones work, learning is NEVER over. If gaining “higher knowledge” makes somebody more manipulative, cruel, arrogant, controlling, or obsessed with hierarchy…perhaps they missed the lesson…and you might want to “miss” them. 🙂
Sacrifice Isn’t Necessarily a Dirty Word Either
People hear “sacrifice” and imagine suffering, punishment, deprivation…I understand…but sometimes it is much more ordinary. Sometimes it looks like;
– I want a home more than I want this daily luxury.
– I want health more than I want this habit.
– I want to build something more than I want immediate gratification.
– I want peace more than I want to win this argument.
– I want my purpose more than I want everybody’s approval.
That is sacrifice. Lessons I learned very well in my homelessness. It is choosing what matters most. Sometimes I had to decide, do I want this convenient thing today, or do I want to put that money toward getting somewhere safer tomorrow? Nobody was punishing me. Sure it was hard…but I was establishing a priority. That’s what discipline is. And discipline isn’t always glamorous. Actually…it’s almost never glamorous.
😂
Spirituality Isn’t What You Say When You’re Comfortable
Your path reveals itself when something costs you. When you’re angry, rejected, don’t get your way, when someone insults you, or when no one applauds you…what you do when you could lie and don’t…when revenge feels justified…when you’re tired and afraid……when there’s a shortcut that doesn’t align with your true purpose…THAT’S when I want to know what you believe…Anybody can be peaceful at an Ashram, Cave, Island or a meditation retreat. 😂
Show me peace when somebody pisses you off. Anybody can preach non attachment while getting everything they want. Show me non attachment when something disappears. Anybody can preach unconditional love to an audience that adores them. Show me who you are when somebody disagrees. That is where spiritual practice becomes spiritual life.
The Greatest Secret May Be Extremely Annoying
Maybe there isn’t one final ceremony where somebody whispers the secrets to the universe into your ear. Maybe you never get the list…maybe the “great secret” is considerably less glamorous and simple.
Maybe it looks more like learning to; Govern yourself. Know yourself. Question yourself. Take responsibility. Develop discernment. Keep your word. Learn when to act, and not to act. Stop trying to control everybody else. Stop chasing power you haven’t developed the character to carry. Do the work even when nobody sees it. Sacrifice convenience when something greater matters. Live what you say…
Again…And again…And again…Not terribly sexy, is it? It’s HARD work! Perhaps that’s why people keep looking for another simple secret.
Everybody Wants the Keys to the Kingdom
Very few people want to become trustworthy with the keys. That is what I was trying to say all those years ago. Magic isn’t entertainment to me. Spirituality isn’t decoration. Discipline isn’t punishment. Knowledge isn’t status and TRUE power isn’t domination. The deeper I go into any spiritual path, the less interested I become in controlling anything outside myself. And maybe that is the paradox.
The person obsessed with obtaining power over everyone else may be demonstrating exactly why they shouldn’t have it. The person who has learned to govern themselves may discover they no longer want it. So if you want secret knowledge…wonderful… Study, question, experience, learn…GO FORTH AND LIVE IT…BE IT! And also ask, What am I doing with what I already know? Shouldn’t I master level 2 before I move on to 3?
If you want “magic”…ask whether you live magically when nobody is looking. If you want spiritual power…ask how responsibly you wield the ordinary power you already have over your words, choices, reactions, money, sexuality, attention, and relationships. If you want initiation…perhaps begin with yourself.
Because if your spiritual path only exists on Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, at retreats, or during ceremonies…I don’t know what you’re practicing. But I know what you’re NOT doing.
LIVING IT…
And that’s where the real work begins.