Stop Waiting for Politicians to Love Your Neighbor
Many years ago, immediately after another particularly emotional American election, I made a video asking a question that apparently I am still asking…… when exactly did we decide that changing the world was somebody else’s job?
Every couple years, the ritual begins again. A new collection of people appears on television. They tell us, “I will fix this, I will protect you, I will restore that, I will save the country, I will fight for you, I will make everything better…”
And millions of people become convinced that THIS time…THIS person…THIS party…THIS election…is the one that will finally change everything!!!
Then a few years pass. Some things change. Some don’t. Some promises disappear. Some become excuses to blame the “other side.” And some become somebody else’s fault….And before long, another election arrives and we repeat the entire emotional process…with new slogans, new villains, new heroes, new promises.
Same neighbors. Same fights……
I call it…Election Amnesia! 😂
This Was Never About Trump
The original version of this message came out after the 2016 election, when people were furious that Donald Trump had defeated Hillary Clinton in my “Make America Great Again” video. For the record, this was not a Trump endorsement. It wasn’t a Hillary endorsement. It wasn’t an Obama endorsement…or Bush…or Clinton….or………………….whichever politician happens to be wearing the costume this year.
That was the entire point. And STILL is.
I have never been particularly interested in worshipping political personalities. And I have certainly never understood destroying relationships with ordinary people over somebody sitting hundreds or thousands of miles away who does not know either one of us exists.
You voted for him? Okay. You voted for her? Okay. You voted for somebody else? Okay. You didn’t vote? Okay.
What I’m more concerned with is………….Is your neighbor hungry, hurting or in some type of need?
Because that question interests me considerably more…and I would argue is the SOLUTION to the divides we have all fallen for…
We Have Been Outsourcing Our Humanity
This is what bothers me about politics. Not that people participate. Not that people vote. Not that people care about laws or government. Of course those things can affect real lives. What bothers me is how easily participation becomes substitution for humanity.
We vote for somebody who promises compassion…and then walk past somebody suffering. We demand that politicians help struggling families…while knowing nothing about the family living three doors down. We complain about homelessness…while never speaking to a homeless person…offering them food or a shower…We demand better communities…while spending our time fighting with the people inside them over PERCEIVED beliefs.
We even post things like “LOVE WINS” in public forums…then find out the person next door voted differently and decide they are no longer worthy of love. 😂
Something seems a little backward there.
What If Nobody Is Coming to Save Us?
What question used to frighten me. Now I find it strangely empowering. What if no politician is going to create the world we want? What if no president can manufacture true community? What if no law can make us love one another? What if no election can force us to become decent neighbors? What if THAT part is actually our job???
Suddenly we have a lot more power than we thought…
You may not control Congress. You may not control the White House. You may not control the governor. You may not control your city council. You may barely control your goats… 😂
But there are things you CAN control. You can check on somebody. You can shovel a driveway. You can cook a meal. You can bring someone water. You can help somebody fix something. You can share someone’s small business. You can recommend a local farmer. You can buy from the person making something down the road. You can listen. You can smile. You can sit beside someone having the worst day of their life and let them know, I see you!
Never underestimate that one!
A Smile Once Helped Save My Life
There was a period of my life when I was homeless, sick, frightened and trying to figure out how I was supposed to survive. At one point I found myself in Seattle. I wasn’t a city person or familiar with the area…I was struggling physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. I was grieving. I was healing. I was scared…And emotionally, I was in a very dark place, contemplating suicide because it was the only thing I knew that could have lessened the pain. I remember sitting there wondering, okay, I’m here…NOW WHAT???oAnd something extraordinary happened. Several complete strangers approached me throughout that evening. Some told me I was beautiful. Some said there was something bright about me. Some simply smiled. Then one woman asked, “How are you?”
And because sometimes you can pretend you’re fine right up until somebody sincerely asks…I cried and said, “I’m fine.” She knew I was lying…but she was still there….I looked at her and essentially asked, “Are you sure you actually want to know?”
And she did! She actually looked at me like another human being and sat down next to me on the street…not as a homeless person, not as a political or religious category…not as the cause of all of her problems…….and not someone beneath her. She actually looked at me like a was a human being…with a soul! Which is a rarity when you are homeless and disabled.
We talked. We became friends. That connection even eventually led to paying work! But the part that has stayed with me all these years is simpler…
Those strangers had no idea how badly I needed someone to acknowledge that I existed. They didn’t know what I had survived. They didn’t ask who I voted for. They didn’t ask my religion. They didn’t ask my sexuality. They didn’t ask whether I belonged to their political tribe…They just offered kindness. And several people whose names I never even learned helped me make it through one more night.
It cost them nothing! No legislation, no tax increase, no campaign, no committee, no government program…..
A smile. A kind word. A little human recognition…COMPASSION!
Sometimes that is enough to help somebody get through another hour. And sometimes another hour is everything…
That Changed How I Think About Power
People imagine power as something enormous and out of reach for the common folk… Presidents, governments, corporations, money, status, influence, titles…But I have experienced another kind. The power to make somebody feel visible. The power to feed someone. The power to make a frightened child laugh. The power to sit with somebody who is grieving. The power to teach and learn. The power to grow food. The power to repair something. The power to build community around a table. Those things appear small…
But they aren’t. Perhaps those are the things that can make a real difference….or even “make america great again?!?!”
A “civil”ization is eventually nothing more than millions of these tiny interactions piled on top of one another. If enough of those interactions become cruel…we create a cruel place.
If enough become compassionate…we create something else. That means ordinary people possess enormous power. Which may explain why I get frustrated watching us surrender it so easily.
Vote With More Than a Ballot
Years ago I talked about voting with your dollars. I still believe that money is one of the only votes that matter! Everybody says they want thriving little towns. More mom and pop businesses…local farms…independent artists…local makers of things…small shops…community resiliance…OKAY…..
So where does your money go?
Because our bank statements are sometimes more revealing than our bumper stickers and facebook personas. 😂
If you want local farms to survive…buy something from a farmer when you reasonably can.
If you want local artists…buy art.
If you want independent shops…walk through their doors.
If someone nearby makes the thing you were already planning to buy from a giant corporation, perhaps at least consider the neighbor first. Not because anybody is entitled to your money, they aren’t. Not because every local product is automatically superior, it isn’t.
But because the world we financially support is the world we help keep alive! What world are YOU creating??? Money spent with an enormous corporation disappears into an enormous machine. Money spent with an ordinary person might become groceries, animal feed, plants, rent, a childs shoes or learning materials, a broken water heater, garden supplies….even another local purchase…
Another month that somebody gets to keep doing what they love…That is also voting. And unlike an election, you may cast that vote every day.
Stop Asking Politicians to Practice Values We Won’t Practice Ourselves
This is where I probably irritate everybody equally. LOL People demand compassion from the left. People demand responsibility from the right. People demand freedom, justice, family values, equality, charity, community and personal responsibility….
Okay.,,,GREAT!!! BUT….and here’s a big butt….lol Are we actually practicing any of it ourselves?
Because it is very easy to demand morality from somebody on television. It is considerably harder to practice it with the annoying human being living next door.
It is easy to say, “Love thy neighbor” while in church on Sunday…Until the neighbor votes differently, worships differently, loves differently, looks differently, lives differently…calls God by another name…or doesn’t believe in God or politics at all.
Then suddenly we discover that there were apparently terms and conditions attached. 🙁
That isn’t the kind of community I want.
Political Parties Are Not Families
Something else happens during elections that I find deeply strange. People begin treating political affiliation as identity. Not just a simple, “I agree with this policy.” But that, “These are MY people.” And once that happens, disagreement feels like betrayal. Now we aren’t discussing ideas. We’re defending tribes, lines, borders…
Someone criticizes our favorite politician or celebrity and it feels like they criticized us…lol Someone votes differently and suddenly they’re the enemy. Eventually people who live on the same street begin hating each other on behalf of people who will probably never know their names. That is an astonishing bargain…warring with your neighbors over “thought crimes?”
I don’t need a political party to tell me who my neighbor is. I don’t need a politician to tell me whom I’m allowed to love. And I certainly don’t need an election to determine whether somebody deserves my compassion!
As for me…..feel free to grab your pitchfoks now….I personally view it a high crime of the Natural World…of “God” to vote for a slavemaster top take things away from my neighbors. And being that 47% of us americans don’t vote…we should be the winning party, no? lol
Maybe Election Amnesia Is Bigger Than Elections
Perhaps election amnesia isn’t simply forgetting broken promises. Maybe it’s forgetting our own power every time somebody offers to exercise it for us…forgetting that we have the power to change lives every day in our own circle. We forget that we can build things and bridges… We forget that we can organize. We forget that we can feed people. We forget that we can trade, barter, teach, grow, repair, share, protect, create, solve problems…….and LOVE……..Right here. Right now!
We forget that enormous systems are ultimately made of ordinary flawed human beings. Then election season arrives and suddenly everybody is waiting for one person to fix millions of lives from the top down. What if we built from the bottom up? What if millions of people each made their immediate circle a little safer? A little kinder? A little more resilient? A little less lonely? A little more loving…..?
Imagine that.
I Still Believe in Community
After everything I’ve lived through, I still believe in it…perhaps foolishly. 😂 I believe in people growing food together…sharing skills, helping neighbors, creating sake spaces, teaching, learning, supporting independent businesses, caring for elders, making music, repairing what we can, feeding each other, listening, laughing, building relationships across differences…
I believe many hands make heavy things lighter and 2 heads are better than 1. I believe everybody has something useful to contribute. And I believe one of the greatest tragedies of modern life is that we forgot how to LOVE and have been convinced we are powerless unless somebody in “authority” acts first.
I don’t buy that anymore. What if YOU authored your book and actually practiced what you preached….or begged “the other side” for?
You Have the Power to Make Somebody’s Day Better Right Now
That was one of the central things I said in the old video. I still believe it. Maybe more than anything else. If you truly believe this politician is taking things away from vulnerable people, why don’t you go feed them?
You do not need money. You don’t need permission. You don’t need a nonprofit. You don’t need political office. You don’t need followers. You don’t need a degree…
Sometimes you need nothing more than the ability to notice another human being. Sometimes you only need the ability to see that they are also human and have the same needs you do.
Smile. Say hello. Ask them if they are okay……….then actually wait for the answer. The FULL answer, no matter how uncomfortable or heart breaking…
Maybe bring soup…
It sounds ridiculously small compared with changing the world. But I have been the person for whom something that small WAS the world. That’s why I know.
So Vote If You Want To
Vote red. Vote blue. Vote independent. Vote third party. Abstain. Or what I’ve always recommended….VOTE FOR YOURSELF! :)Study every candidate. Argue policy until your eyeballs fall out. 😂 That part belongs to you.
But after the election…please remember that your neighbor is still standing there. And someday one of you may need the other. A storm won’t ask how you voted before knocking your power out. A broken down car doesn’t care about party affiliation. Cancer doesn’t check bumper stickers. Grief doesn’t ask which news channel you watch. Hunger doesn’t care who won the election. And loneliness doesn’t become easier because your candidate did win.
Human beings need other human beings. We always have.
Make Your Corner Better
Perhaps we have spent too long asking “Who will make the country better?” When maybe the question should be, “What can I make better from where I’m standing?” Can I help one person? Can I support one neighbor? Can I grow something? Can I teach something? Can I fix something? Can I listen? Can I make somebody laugh? Can I stop participating in a pointless feud? Can I spend my money more intentionally, aligned with the world I want to see? Can I build the kind of community I keep complaining doesn’t exist?
That’s where I want to put my vote. In my actions. Every day. Because I have lived long enough to watch political faces change over and over. I have watched promises come and go. I have watched people celebrate. I have watched people panic. And somehow, after every election…we still have to wake up the next morning and figure out how to live together.
Maybe that’s the part we should stop forgetting…Stop fighting with your neighbor on behalf of people who don’t know your name. Stop waiting for permission to care. Stop outsourcing compassion. Stop assuming somebody powerful is eventually going to build the world you’ve been imagining. Build your piece of it…like I’m doing here at Ozarks Church of Nature and Magicl Food Forest.
Feed somebody. Support somebody. Grow something. Teach something. Create something. Smile at somebody who looks like they have forgotten why they should keep going. Because you may never know what that tiny act changed. I know several strangers in Seattle never knew what theirs changed for me.
But I remember. All these years later…
I REMEMBER!!!
And no election has ever taught me more about changing the world than that.